Haiku #067

Glossary for this haiku

align

Bureaucratic
/əˈlaɪn/v. (aspirational)

Etym.from Old French aligner, later anglicized as align and repurposed in Silicon Valley circa 2014 by a strategy consultant who needed a softer synonym for compliance, see R. Hargrove, 'Terms for Transformation,' 2016.

A rhetorical maneuver that professes shared priorities to postpone substantive decisions and shift accountability into future milestones.

'Can everyone confirm shared priorities by EOD' - Proceedings of the 2019 All-Hands Meeting

leverage

Bureaucratic
/ˈlɛv.ər.ɪdʒ/n. (bureaucratic)

Etym.From Old French levier and Latin levare 'to lift', repurposed in corporate English during the 1990s by consultants seeking a noun that implied advantage without specification (Keane, 2003).

A managerial invocation that implies operational effectiveness without measurable criteria; leverage obscures accountability by presenting vague scalability as a remedy.

'Leverage existing platforms to unlock synergies across the portfolio' - Q2 Strategy Memo, slide 3

north star

Bureaucratic
/ˈnɔrθˌstɑr/n. (aspirational)

Etym.from the navigational phrase 'north star', originally denoting Polaris, adopted into corporate strategy parlance circa 2012 by a boutique consultancy seeking majestic-sounding direction, cited in Strategy Glossary, 2015.

A rhetorical device that converts vague long-term ambition into an indefinite project timeline and absolves present commitments of measurable accountability.

'This will be our guiding light, pending resource allocation and metric definition' - Q3 Board Deck, slide 12

table stakes

Bureaucratic
/ˈteɪ.bəl steɪks/phrase (evasive)

Etym.From poker, where it denotes compulsory betting amounts; migrated into corporate parlance circa 1990s as a sterner synonym for baseline requirements, see Kowalski 2008, Business Lexicon Review.

A rhetorical device that rebrands ordinary baseline requirements as nonnegotiable prerequisites, used to inflate modest needs and deter further scrutiny.

'This is table stakes for any vendor' - Q3 Board Deck, slide 47