Haiku #035

Glossary for this haiku

foster

Bureaucratic
/ˈfɑːs.tɚ/v. (aspirational)

Etym.from a 2010s corporate neologism engineered to sound nurturing without implying action, popularized by boutique strategy firms, see L. Harrow, Lexicon of Enterprise, 2014.

A verb deployed to signal supportive intent while transferring responsibility and avoiding measurable commitments.

'We will foster cross-team innovation while optimizing headcount' - Q3 Product Memo

deep dive

Bureaucratic
/ˌdiːpˈdaɪv/phrase (evasive)

Etym.from nautical inspection imagery, adopted into corporate speech by consulting reports and internal memos in the mid-2000s, see Pritchard, Corporate Lexica, 2011.

A rhetorical maneuver that promises focused analysis while expanding scope, deferring judgment, and absorbing dissent.

'Let's schedule a deep dive next week' - Q1 Sprint Planning Notes

scale

Colloquial
/skeɪl/v. (aspirational)

Etym.From L. scala, 'ladder', repurposed into corporate parlance circa 2010 by a consulting associate who needed a word that implied growth without immediate budgeting, see Henley, Corporate Metaphors, 2014.

To defer investment decisions and accountability by framing operational expansion as an inevitable future state rather than a present cost.

'We will scale next quarter' - Q3 Board Deck, slide 12

holistic

Bureaucratic
/hoʊˈlɪs.tɪk/adj. (vaporous)

Etym.From Gk. holos, 'whole,' reintroduced into boardroom parlance circa 2009 as holistic by a brand strategist who needed a term implying totality without measurable content, Baxter 2011, Journal of Strategic Buzz.

An adjective deployed to expand descriptive scope while deflecting requests for metrics, timelines, or accountable ownership.

'We will adopt a holistic roadmap to drive cross-functional alignment' - Q3 Board Deck, slide 47