Haiku #083

Glossary for this haiku

synergy

Bureaucratic
/ˈsɪn.ɚ.dʒi/n. (bureaucratic)

Etym.from L. synergia, 'working together', revived in corporate English during the 2000s to supply a quantifiable-sounding cover for merger rhetoric; see E. Mallory, Journal of Corporate Rhetoric, 2011.

A deliberately vague noun deployed to claim added value from loosely related assets, thereby permitting assertions without metrics or timelines.

'We should prioritize synergy across products and partnerships' - Q3 Board Deck, slide 12

cascade

Bureaucratic
/kæˈskeɪd/n. (bureaucratic)

Etym.From French cascade meaning 'waterfall', repurposed in business jargon during the early 2010s by a consultant looking for a softer word for reassignment; see Journal of Strategic Rhetoric, 2014.

A cascade is a staged transfer of responsibility or risk down a sequence of teams, employed to postpone accountability and preserve appearances.

'We'll cascade these deliverables into Q4 to manage external expectations' - Q3 Board Deck, slide 47

bandwidth

Bureaucratic
/ˈbænd.wɪdθ/n. (metaphorical)

Etym.From electrical-engineering jargon for spectral capacity, repurposed by corporate communicators in the 1990s to quantify time and attention, see H. L. Carrington, Corporate Lexicon Review 1999.

A polite, numeric-sounding metaphor used to excuse declined requests by attributing failure to limited human time or attention.

'I don't have the bandwidth for that' - Q3 Board Deck, slide 12

runway

Bureaucratic
/ˈrʌn.weɪ/n. (bureaucratic)

Etym.from mid-20th-century aviation jargon, repurposed in early 21st-century venture discourse to quantify company survival in investor communications, see Sommers, Venture Language, 2011.

A single-number projection, expressed in months of funded operation, that reduces cash on hand and burn rate to a negotiable timeframe used to justify spending, hiring, or fundraising.

'We need to extend runway by 12 months to hit the growth inflection' - Q2 Board Deck, slide 12